Saturday, November 30, 2019

Quizbowl free essay sample

After lunch, announcements are read over the publicaddress system at my school. When the teacher comes to Quizbowl in room212, I erupt, Yea, Quizbowl! Do not get the wrongimpression Quizbowl is not an important or even a well-liked organization. Infact, compared with the majority of activities, it is at the bottom of the list.Those who advocate Quizbowl are often shunned, and I am the leader of theseoutcasts. But to those who are members, Quizbowl is hard-core, unadulterated fun.As captain, I have thoroughly annoyed many high-ranking school officials on itsbehalf. As one teacher proclaimed, Quizbowl is my baby. In order tounderstand fully my role in Quizbowl and how this intellectual experience givesme such satisfaction, an explanation of the game is required. Quizbowl is, simplyput, a mind game. Our battlefield is (usually) a table, and our weapons are ourbrains. It is best described as Jeopardy! with teams. Teams buzz inanswers with points awarded per question, and occasionally teams lose points forearly, incorrect answers. We will write a custom essay sample on Quizbowl or any similar topic specifically for you Do Not WasteYour Time HIRE WRITER Only 13.90 / page Depending on the tournament, there may be one or twoopponents, bonus questions, different types of questions in different rounds andmany other idiosyncrasies. The captains job is not only to lead the team, answerquestions and delegate responsibility, but also to inform teammates of the rules,when they should and should not guess and what strategies to take. Thereare two reasons this intellectual activity gives me so much satisfaction. First,it is not very popular, and the fact that I have helped cultivate interest andmotivate members is a serious accomplishment. The other is that we did fairlywell this year; at one tournament we placed higher than we have in manyyears. The lack of support for the team does surprise me, for I findQuizbowl as exhilarating as a basketball game or tennis match. Fans who watchedus play at our high-placing tournament were in for a treat. There, three teamsplayed at a time, with each guaranteed three matches. The first-, second- andthird-place teams received three, two and one point(s), respectively. Normally ateam needs a score of six to advance. In our first match we were in last place,down by five, with time running out. While the last question was being read, oneof the other teams buzzed in incorrectly and early, getting a 5-point penalty. Ibuzzed in, receiving an awkward look from the moderator. His face seemed to say,Hey, kid, they just got it wrong. I am going to read the whole question foryou. What are you doing? My answer, however, was correct, which brought usinto second place and in contention for the hallowed afternoon rounds. We placedsecond in our second match, which included the challenge of playing last ye arschampions. Our third match was like our first, a nail-biter to the finish. Weended up in exactly the same situation no time left as the last question wasread. One of my teammates buzzed in, and from that point on my memory replays inslow motion. He declared his answer in that slow, deep, wave-like voice one hearsat a suspenseful juncture in a movie. He was correct, we received a bonusquestion (which we also answered correctly) and we won. How can that not be asexhilarating as hitting a home run at the bottom of the ninth with the basesloaded? Our team earned seven points and placed 34th out of 80 schools.Unfortunately, only the top 32 teams advance. Teddy Roosevelt once saidsomething along the lines that there is nothing in life more satisfying thanworking hard at something worth doing. That is why Quizbowl is so important to meand such a great intellectual experience. The team has overcome adversity notonly in competition, but also in its lack of support. I am proud to say that, tosome extent, I am responsible for this.

Tuesday, November 26, 2019

9 Tips to Advance Your Career

9 Tips to Advance Your Career While the recession’s aftermath is still affecting many workplaces, and it’s easy to get discouraged and shut down, Canadian professional consultant Bruce Harpham has been making an effort to focus on the potential opportunities that inevitable emerge from a time of stress. Even if you’re bracing for another round of layoffs or trying to boost your career during a stagnant time in your field, check out this tips to help harness your energies in meaningful ways and keep making a difference at work. 1. Work On Goals That MatterWhether you’re in your dream job or biding time until you can land something better, find a way to care about your daily assignments. If the goals your boss hands you aren’t exciting enough, find something in your personal life (ideally, something that benefits your career too like a new skill set) that you can only tackle once you’ve completed your work to-dos. Make your daily work meaningful however you can–emplo yers will notice your enthusiasm.2. Use a Reliable Personal Organization SystemAccording to Harpham, among other things, â€Å"successful professionals know how to run a meeting†. Make sure your personal work life is well-organized and effective–develop good habits, use consistent systems, and if organization doesn’t come naturally to you, explore resources to help you acquire new skills. Personal organization is a toolkit you can take with you wherever you go.3. Learn to Earn MoreEffective employees are always acquiring new responsibilities, new skills, and new goals. Don’t stay comfortable at the plateau you reach when you learn your way around a new job–use resources online or in your community to pursue new knowledge, so when the next big opportunity comes up you’re not only qualified, you’re the ideal candidate.4. Navigate Power Like a PrinceEven if your career ambitions aren’t as lofty as a Senior VP, you’ll only b enefit from staying sharp and observing how powerful people move through the workplace. Work to understand the priorities and decision-making methods of the people in power; it’ll help you relate to them and prepare for the demands of your future career as well.5. Maintain Focus on Results Rather Than TimeMany an hourly worker develops a â€Å"time worked equals value created† mentality - lose the attitude, but keep the work ethic, and make sure you’ve produced worthwhile progress each and every day.6. Exploit All Of Your BenefitsThe essential benefits from working a full-time job, like health and retirement, are easy to appreciate–but make sure you’re making the best possible use of the lesser known perks as well. Some companies offer transportation subsidies–lower price public transit passes or parking reimbursement; I once worked at a company that had a partnership with an entertainment organization. I enjoyed half price theater and base ball tickets all summer, but many of my colleagues had no idea these rebates existed.7. Give Time, Attention, and More To Your NetworkDon’t be the person who only gets in touch with an old contact when you want something. Remembering birthdays, introducing people who can help each other, even forwarding an article about an old friend’s favorite hobby with a â€Å"saw this and thought of you!† note can show that you’re not just a parasitic acquaintance. Be generous with your time and network, and it will be there for you when you need it.8. Protect the Asset By Keeping Up Your HealthIt may sound odd to think of your physical health as an asset–but wait until you lose it, and you’re out of sick time. Regular exercise, attention to nutrition, and most important of all, a good night’s sleep on a regular basis are crucial elements to making sure your career lasts, instead of burning out fast.9. Develop Conflict Management SkillsEspecially for an ambitious person, conflict is fairly inevitable. The good news is, conflict resolution techniques can be learned, if they’re not innate or acquired earlier in life. Check out local resources or consult an HR representative to find out what workshops may be available for you, if conflict makes your stomach churn. You too can learn to field even the toughest clients and colleagues with poise.The only thing Harpham left out was the importance of showing up, whenever you’re well enough to do so. Value your job, value your time, and value yourself–be the best team player you can be.9 Ways To Speed Up Your Career AdvancementRead More at Lifehack

Friday, November 22, 2019

How to Answer the 10 Toughest Interview Questions

How to Answer the 10 Toughest Interview Questions Everyone is nervous on interviews, but with a little practice and guidance, you will be able to confidently answer the most difficult interview questions and land the job. To help you prepare, here 10 of the toughest interview questions and how to answer them.1. â€Å"Tell Me About Yourself†This question can be tricky because the interviewer is essentially aiming to discover who you are as a person and how well you fit with the company.Full Answer   6 Steps to Answering ‘Tell Me About Yourself’ During a Job Interview2. â€Å"Why Should I Hire You?†In an interview, few questions can throw off a candidate’s poise like the simple, â€Å"Why should I hire you?† After all, it seems redundant. What have you been talking about this entire time, if not the reasons why the company should hire you?!Full Answer   6 Dos and Don’ts for Answering â€Å"Why Should I Hire You?†3. â€Å"Where Do You See Yourself in Five Years?†When you ’re sitting in an interview, there’s a good chance that most of your mental real estate lately has been going toward this day. So when the interviewer asks you where you see yourself in five years, it can be a bit of a jolt to suddenly think about the long term.Full Answer   How to Answer â€Å"Where Do You See Yourself in 5 Years?†Ã‚  4. â€Å"What’s Your Perfect Day?†Recently, it came out that Facebook’s head recruiter’s favorite interview question to ask is more like a personal essay question. â€Å"On your very best day at work- the day you come home and think you have the best job in the world- what did you do that day?†Now that this is making the viral rounds, don’t be surprised to hear it in your non-Facebook interviews as well. Here are some tips for breaking the question down and being ready to pounce on it.Full Answer  Ã‚  How to Answer the â€Å"What’s Your Perfect Day?† Interview Question5. â€Å"The Salary Question†The job application process has a number of separate stages: applying, interviewing, job offer, then salary negotiation and acceptance. Most employers stick to this, and let the money talk wait until things are further along. But if they jump the gun and ask you up front for a) your current salary or b) desired salary, what do you do?Full Answer   How to Answer the Salary Question in an Interview6. â€Å"Can I Contact Your Current Employer†If anyone asks where you were today, you were at a dentist’s appointment. Right? The vague â€Å"appointment,† always in the middle of the day, is a classic tactic for interviewing for new jobs while you’re still at your current one. You just put up your â€Å"out of office† message and hope no one notices that you’re awfully dressed up for a Wednesday. However, your slick cover story could be blown if the interviewing company contacts your current one.Full Answer   How to Answer â€Å"Can I Contact Your Current Employer?†7. â€Å"Why Have You Had So Many Jobs?†You’re sitting in the interview, and things are going fine, when the hiring manager looks up from your resume, eyebrow raised, and asks the question you’ve been dreading: â€Å"You’ve had an awful lot of jobs, haven’t you? Can you walk me through that?†Full Answer   How to Answer â€Å"Why Have You Had So Many Jobs?†8. â€Å"Aren’t You Overqualified For This Position?†In an ideal world, we’d all be applying for (and getting) a job that is a perfect, snug fit for our skills, experience, and career goals. In the real world, that’s not always an option. Maybe you were laid off, and are seeking a foot (any foot!) back in the door of your career path. Perhaps you’re feeling stalled in your current job, and are looking to move back a step or two to get new skills and experience. Whatever the reason, it co uld very well lead to the dreaded â€Å"aren’t you overqualified for this position?† question in an interview.Full Answer   The Best Way to Answer the â€Å"Aren’t You Overqualified?† Interview Question  9. â€Å"Why Are You Leaving This Position?†Chances are, the interviewer will ask you why you’re looking to leave your current job- or if you’re currently unemployed, why you left your last job.Full Answer   How to Answer the 5 Most Common Interview Questions10. â€Å"What Changes Would You Make if You Came On Board?†Watch out!   This question can derail your candidacy faster than a bomb on the tracks  and just as you are about to be hired. No matter how bright you are, you cannot know the right actions to take in a position before you settle in and get to know the operation’s strengths, weaknesses key people, financial condition, methods of operation, etc.   If you lunge at this temptingly baited question, y ou will probably be seen as someone who shoots from the hip.

Wednesday, November 20, 2019

Cheating cannot disappear in the school Research Paper

Cheating cannot disappear in the school - Research Paper Example Further, a cursory analysis with regards to the scope and impacts of unlimited cheating will be discussed. Firstly, it must be understood cheating is something of a social phenomena within the world. Although the impacts of cheating within scholastics have only recently come to a broad level of understanding, the fact of the matter is that cheating is a type of social problem that traces its origins back to the innate desire for an individual to gain a competitive advantage over his/her peers with the least amount of effort. Ultimately, the human spirit is one that continually seeks for self betterment and a level of advantage over their fellow students (Bing et al. 29). Oftentimes, this desire to be better engages the individual to try harder and exert their selves more fully. However, oftentimes, the case is that the individual seeks a shortcut with regards to maintaining an advantage and reaching a desired goal. This shortcut can either be the reduction in the overall quality of t he work that they represent or it can be referenced with regards to the fact that the seek to cheat in one form or the other as a means of providing themselves the benefits that had previously been mentioned. Regardless of the way in which cheating is defined, it must be understood cheating is not localized to the University or secondary education systems. Rather, from an early age, children are made aware of the fact that cheating is very much a part of adult life. From the way in which a colleague takes advantage of another and claims his/her own work as their own, the manner in which the government is cheated out of taxes (and individuals brag about this), or the manner through which deception is utilized in business deals, the young stakeholders presented with a litany of different situations in which cheating is both allowed and even promoted. Recognizing that cheating is a defensible approach to effecting the goals that they wish to accomplish, students engage in this process with not nearly enough reservations with regards to the negative ramifications of such a process can necessarily engage. Ultimately, the practice of cheating is reinforced within a young individual due to the fact that the process itself is oftentimes rewarded within both the adult world and the scholastic world. One does not need to look very hard to find a situation in which cheating within the corporate dynamic has provided an individual, or indeed entire corporation, with a great deal of benefit Orwell as compared to those that would have chosen the more ethical and/or moral approach. By much the same token, cheating within the scholastic realm has proven to be beneficial in many instances as well. A key proof of the situation has to do with the fact that information has recently been revealed that Moammar Gaddafi’s son, Saif, had plagiarized his PhD dissertation while studying in London. Naturally, proof of this

Tuesday, November 19, 2019

Social Responsibility Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 250 words - 2

Social Responsibility - Essay Example When Smith says, he has â€Å"never known much good done by those who affected to trade for the public good† and calls it an â€Å"affectation [indeed] not very common among merchants† (159), he may be referring to businesspeople who do good so much that they run their businesses to the ground. An example is a baker giving away too much free bread that he becomes bankrupt. Merchants do not want to go bankrupt because they do not want to trade for the public good more than they want to make profits. In addition, Smith does not necessarily say that companies should ignore the greater good in making profits. He emphasizes the importance of trading in making profits, but he does not promote unethical or illegal practices because if the public know about it or if the government catches them, then they will have bad publicity or the government might close their business. My definition of social responsibility is responsibility for shareholders, employees, consumers, communities where businesses operate, and the environment. This does not fit into Friedman’s definition to some extent. My social responsibility definition agrees with Friedman that social responsibility promotes the goal of increasing profits. Staying within the rules of the game can also be aligned with being responsible for employees, consumers, communities where businesses operate, and the environment because laws also protect them in varying degrees. However, how about in communities or countries where fairness and environmental laws are weak or lacking? My definition of social responsibility is proactive in doing what is right for all stakeholders with or without these laws. I believe that businesses have a social responsibility to their fellow man because I agree with Kant that people have duties to do what can be universalized and doing my definition of social responsibili ty is something that can be

Saturday, November 16, 2019

Burned by Ellen Hopkins Essay Example for Free

Burned by Ellen Hopkins Essay Ellen Hopkins wrote this novel about a girl who grew up in a Mormon household, and is beginning to think that this is not a lifestyle she wants for herself. With an abusive father, lazy and passive mother, and constant conflicts with the Mormon teachings and beliefs, she refuses to give in to that way of life. She refuses to ever become property to a husband who she is taught to â€Å"obey† or a baby producing machine. With her new resilience and want for a normal life, it angers her father. He sends her to live with his estranged sister for the summer, but what he doesn’t realize is that he’s giving her freedom and a chance to live. She learns to love and that life as she knew it was never a life meant for her. Hopkins’ book shows the life of a Mormon girl; Pattyn Scarlet Von Stratten. Pattyn is tired of the Mormon lifestyle and rebels against her family and the rules of her home and church. Her father spends most of the time drunk and angry and her mother has a whole household to take care of. After Pattyn gets in a fight and breaks a window, her family has had enough of her rebelling so they send her to live with her Aunt, out in the middle of nowhere, for the summer, so she can no longer get in trouble. It turns out that she has fun on her stay with her aunt, she learns how to drive and ride a horse, and meets the love of her life. She fell in love with Ethan, the son of her aunt’s friend. He is not Mormon and her father would kill the both of them if they were together. After returning home things start to go bad again. She mouths off to her father and gets beaten. She takes the rap for something her sister does, and gets beaten to save her sister. She also learns that she will have Ethan’s baby. Like all of Hopkins novels, Burned also has a tragic ending. Ethan and Pattyn get in a car wreck and she wakes up in the hospital to learn that she lost Ethan and her baby. In the end she says that God could not be love because love was a corpse, because she lost the love of her life, and the only thing remnant of him. The book leaves you with the vision of Pattyn sitting above a busy highway, about to take you own life.

Thursday, November 14, 2019

My Personal Philosophy of Education :: Philosophy of Teaching Statement

Philosophy Teachers have been a part of my life for as far back as I can remember. Different individuals have shown me so much in a variety of capacities: some worked in a classroom, some coached me outside of it, and some individuals have simply been a model for how to live a rich life. I consider them all teachers. My decision to become a teacher is founded in the idea that it is one of the most direct ways to influence young people. I believe that students do look upon teachers as role models, sometimes even as they pledge dislike for teachers to their classmates. I have already been working with youth of various ages for several years in the capacity as a tennis coach. I thoroughly enjoy participating in the development of each student’s quest to improve. One of the shining moments of the job is when a student has successfully attained a skill that has been difficult for them. Instantly they understand that effort and intellect have combined to bring them success, a model they can follow far beyond the court. That experience is something that I intend to bring to a classroom and a school system in general, combining the personal growth of a student with the ability to improve one’s grasp of subject matter. For a student to achieve genuine personal growth is not always a simple process, nor is it for any individual, including myself. It is one that I expect will be more difficult when I am not dealing with a student alone or in a small group but with a class of twenty or more students. It is important to both challenge the actively involved student and to draw in the shy or disinterested one. Especially as an English teacher, I feel that it is important to make myself relatable to students early in the year. That being said, it is also important to establish a certain bar of expectation right away. This is a delicate balance as students who look at a teacher (particularly a young one) too personally are likely to attempt to take advantage of the bond. Meanwhile, students are given very little incentive to work hard when the teacher comes across as uncaring or highly authoritarian.

Monday, November 11, 2019

Mother To Son Essay

The author, Langston Husthes, vividly showed how the African-Americans struggled and managed to live. The efforts they made to change and how much they changed their appearances were very evident in the three poems, â€Å"I am too†, â€Å"Mother to Son†, and â€Å"Negro†. The writer started the poem using a conversational tone, which easily showed its viewers that he was talking to somebody. In his poem, â€Å"Mother To Son†, the author told the story of how the African-Americans struggled to survive the harsh realities of living in a society dominated by the white people. The text included: â€Å"Life for me aint been no crystal stair. Its had tacks in it, And splinters, And boards torn up, And places with no carpet on the floor — Bare. † This specific part of the poem showed how much the African-Americans suffered from living in a society dominated by white people. The author used a lot of metaphors in the poem to illustrate his points. The â€Å"crystal stair† mentioned in the poem, contained several meanings. The crystal may be considered to be attractive, but very fragile. The use of the crystal in the poem was somehow successful in connecting a creative story with that of reality-that the crystal stair may be used as a symbol for the way of living white people had. The poem was also told from a mother’s point of view. From the text, it can be perceived that the mother was a slave at the white house, serving white people. The reader is given contrasting images of how the African-Americans suffered, while the white and rich Americans ruled over society. Throughout the entire poem, the mother tried to show the readers the uneven treatment given to both races. Words, such as â€Å"and† were repeatedly used to emphasize the hardships endured during that time. The line, â€Å"And places with no carpet on the floor –Bare,† was also used to demonstrate how the white people unfairly treated the black people.

Saturday, November 9, 2019

Bite Me: A Love Story Chapter 13

13.Being the Chronicles of Abby Normal, Who, Befouled by the Wicked Taint of Rat Suck, Must Find Her Own Murderer How could I have known that my own tragic failure karma would reach out its slimy tentacles and engeeken my heroic Foo beyond the limits of our white-hot romance? ‘Kayso, I was major freaked about the cops almost getting the Countess and I needed to unburden on Foo, which I didn't have a chance, 'cause, as soon as I returned to the love lair, I ran into the comfort of Foo's arms, and rode him gently to the floor where I French-kissed him until he kinda gagged in ecstasy. Then he just threw me off him, like I was a gob of Bubblicious with all the licious chewed out of it. So he's like, â€Å"Not now, Abby. We have a crisis.† â€Å"You 'bout to have a crisis, nerdslice†-I go in my most authentic hip-hop ‘hood-ho accent-â€Å"crisis of my boot heel in your man marbles.† And he totally ignores my hurt feelings and is like, â€Å"Jared, get the door! She left the door open!† So Jared goes all stumbling across the loft to the door, and I'm all, â€Å"You're stretching out my boots.† And Jared is all, â€Å"Rat fog! Rat fog! Rat fog!† And I'm all, â€Å"Don't call me rat fog, bitch. Who held your hair when you drank that whole bottle of crme de menthe and hurled green for an hour?† And Foo's like, â€Å"Abby, look.† All pointing to the little plastic cages on the coffee table, which are kind of empty, then at this steam that's running around the outside of the room and blowing out from under the fridge in the kitchen and whatnot. And I'm, â€Å"‘Splain, s'il vous pla;t.† And Foo's all, â€Å"The rats came awake as vampyres at dusk. And Jared and I were feeding them with the blood that Jody left, by filling their little water bottles. But then when we turned around, the ones we were about to feed were out of their cages. And then we saw some of the cages were still streaming fog out, and the fog was going for the blood bags.† â€Å"And they bite,† goes Jared. â€Å"Yeah, they bite,† goes Foo. And he pulls up his pant leg and shows me where he's been bitten like a dozen times. And I'm like, â€Å"You can't go vamp without me.† And he's all, â€Å"No, I'd have to have some of their blood in me, and I was careful not to even get any on me.† Then all of a sudden there's a stream of mist coming up my boot (I was wearing my red Docs) and a little head starts to appear out of it. Then Foo snags a tennis racket from, like, out of nowhere and smacks the rat head, which goes flying across the room and hits the wall, trailing like a comet tail of mist. I know! A tennis racket. WTF? So I'm all, â€Å"Where did you get a tennis racket? Is that a secret thing with you?† â€Å"Missing the point,† sings Jared, like I'm totally missing the point. â€Å"Hello? We need to be freaked out that they're going to eat us, Nurse Oblivious.† And right then the mist starts taking form again and coming at me, and Foo bats another half-mist rat across the room. So I'm all, â€Å"Okay, good point. What are we going to do?† And I, like, gesture at the button on my sun jacket, because Foo has replaced the battery, which is out of a laptop, and I'm ready to toast some rodents. And Foo's all, â€Å"No, not yet. We have to figure out a way to study them. I need to turn them back to rats. And I have to figure out how this mist is manifesting. I mean, technically, it's not possible.† And I'm like, â€Å"You mean it's magic?† â€Å"I mean I've never even heard of anything like it in nature.† â€Å"Like magic.† He's like, â€Å"There's no such thing as magic.† I'm like, â€Å"The Countess said it was magic.† He's like, â€Å"My grandmother thinks the microwave is magic.† So I'm all, â€Å"It's not?† And Foo's all, â€Å"Magic is just science we don't understand yet.† So I'm all, â€Å"Told you.† And he like sighs all heavy and does his exasperated science face at me, and he's like, â€Å"We have to get them back in their cages. They can't feed when they are in mist form, so we just need to get them feeding and then we can catch them and put them in the cages.† And I'm like, â€Å"Can you believe that Tommy couldn't learn to turn to mist in five weeks and your rats did it, like, overnight? He must be a total tard.† â€Å"Or we have genius rats,† goes Jared, just as Foo is tennis racketing another rat head off his leg. So I'm all, â€Å"Nope, I don't think that's it. Why don't you just put out a little dish of blood and when they turn solid to drink it you can just tennis racket them into a box?† â€Å"We tried that. They figured it out,† goes Foo. And Jared's all, â€Å"See. Genius rats.† Then, to Foo, I'm all, â€Å"He has a thing for rats.† Foo's like, â€Å"Yeah. I got that. They turn back to solid when exposed to UV light, too, but then they start burning.† Then Jared's like, â€Å"Once, when Lucifer 2 got stuck in a drain pipe in our garage, we sucked him out with my dad's Shop Vac.† And Foo's like, â€Å"That's it. We can suck them up with a Shop Vac.† So I'm like, â€Å"That will just blow the mist out the other side?† â€Å"I can put a really weak UV LED in the barrel of the Shop Vac. Maybe that will be enough to turn them solid without burning them. I'll experiment a little while you're gone.† And I'm all, â€Å"Foo, you know it makes me hot when you talk all nerdy, but what do you mean, while I'm gone?† And he's all, â€Å"To get the Shop Vac. We don't have a Shop Vac.† So I look at Jared, all wobbly-assed on my Skankenstein ® boots, so he's useless, and I'm like, â€Å"Well, I'm not dragging a Shop Vac back on the bus or the F car. Give me your car keys.† And Foo's, like, big â€Å"OH NOEZ† mouth and anime eyes, like, â€Å"Whaaaaa?† And I'm like, â€Å"Unless you really do love your car more than me.† And he's like, â€Å"‘Kay.† And hands them over. Which, as it turns out, was really poor judgment on his part. More L8z. Gotta jet. The tow truck is here. ‘Kayso, it turns out that driving an actual car is way harder than it is in Grand Theft Auto: Zombie Hooker Smackdown. Even though there was only, like, minor damage, it could have been totally avoided if you didn't have to shift so much. Everything was good going to get the Shop Vac, because I only used first and second gear. It was coming home, when I started feeling confident and decided to see if there was a third gear, that it went kind of wrong. Still, all the screaming and crying on Foo's part was kind of over-emo, considering that after the tow truck lowered the Honda, you couldn't even see any damage if you didn't crawl under and look at where the fire hydrant had sort of rearranged a couple of wiry-looking things. And Hondas are totally waterproof for the most part, so no biggie, right? So, it was like this- I drive totally ninja all the way to the Ace Hardware in the Castro, but I didn't park because it involves backing up, which is not in my skill set. So I'm, like, double-parked, and I run in and this crusty guy behind the counter is all, â€Å"You can't park there.† And I'm like, â€Å"Fuck off, butt-munch, I have a guy.† ‘Kayso, I find my gay Builder Bob guy, and he's all, â€Å"Darling, how are you? Fab boots!† And I'm like, â€Å"Thanks, I like your apron. I need a Shop Vac.† And he's all, â€Å"What size?† And I'm like, â€Å"It needs to hold about a hundred rats.† And he's all, â€Å"Girlfriend, we need to party or go shopping and dish.† And I'm, like, totally flattered, because shopping is a sacred thing to gay guys, but I stay on mission, and I'm all, â€Å"In red, if you have it.† Because red is the new black and because it will match my Docs. And so we're going to the Shop Vac section, Bob is like, â€Å"So, how's the dark lord?† And I'm all, â€Å"Oh, he's gone. He tried to tear out my jugular vein, so the Countess threw him out the window and it hurt his feelings.† So Bob pats my shoulder and goes, â€Å"Men. What are you gonna do? He'll be back. The drill worked okay, though?† And I'm like, â€Å"Oh yeah. We got him out, but he broke both his legs because he was kind of eager.† Then Bob gets all protective Daddy-voice on me and is like, â€Å"Safety word, sweetheart. Everyone needs a safety word.† So I'm all, â€Å"‘Kay.† Then Builder Bob helps me get my Shop Vac into the car, because it turns out that it takes a vacuum big enough to sleep inside to suck up a hundred rats. ‘Kayso, then I drove and that thing happened with the car and the cops came and they were all, â€Å"You don't have a license and you're not allowed to drive on the sidewalk, blah, blah, oh my God my insipid cop life is so boring I should just eat my gun, bluster, blah, blah.† And I'm all, â€Å"Chill, cops. Call my cop minions Rivera and Cavuto, s'il vous plaà ®t. They will confirm that I am on a secret cop mission and should not be fucked with by pathetic day dwellers like yourselves.† Then I presented them with Rivera's card, which I whipped out of my messenger bag like it was my badge of badassness. So cop one, who is in charge because he has the car keys, is all, â€Å"I'll check this out, wait here while I go make radio noises in the car like a humongous loser while my wife is home boning some huge stud-muffin.† I'm paraphrasing. And in like two minutes, up pulls Rivera and Cavuto, and they have a dog now. His name is Marvin, and he's trs cute. He's all red, and like a Doberman or something badass, but he totally likes me and his little stubby tail was wagging and I let him drink some of the hydrant water out of my hand, and he did, even though there was plenty of water everywhere, but I guess it tasted like street and whatnot. So I'm like, â€Å"Hey, Rivera, tell these douche waffles that you and the ass bear are my bitches.† And Rivera is all concerned quiet cop voice, â€Å"She has mental problems.† â€Å"Head injury caused Tourette's syndrome,† goes Cavuto. â€Å"We'll handle this from here,† goes Rivera. So I got to ride in the back of the cop car with Marvin and the Shop Vac. It was really crowded and Marvin was all doggie licky love face, so my makeup was trs fucked up by the time we got to the loft. So I'm all, â€Å"Marvin loves me good long time, cops.† And Cavuto's all, â€Å"Figures, he's a cadaver dog.† And I'm all, â€Å"Sure, just make up things to make yourself sound cooler.† And Rivera's like, â€Å"Out. Tell your boyfriend we need our jackets ASAP. And after you deliver the message, go home. You're supposed to be at your mother's house.† ‘Kayso, they abandoned me on the sidewalk with my Shop Vac and drove off. I could see little tears of doggie despair in Marvin's eyes. So I text Foo that I need help getting the Shop Vac up the stairs and he comes down just as the tow truck pulls up, so all the crying and the screaming happens, and Foo is totally inconsolable, even when I offered him a hand job, which is really the best I could do on the sidewalk with people going by and whatnot, but I was rejected, proving, I think, that he really does love his car more than me. So it's like, Oh noez! And an inky-colored despair of rejection enveloped me like the black tortilla of depression around a pain burrito. I needed to mope and grieve for my lost innocence, but no. We had to fix the vacuum so it would suck vampy rat fog and turn it into vampy rat chunks. So while Foo wired science stuff into the Shop Vac, I had to get Jared down off the kitchen counter, where he had decided to stand and chuck a major spaz because he hit his rat fog tolerance level. And Jared's all, â€Å"Get them off me! Get them off me!† And he's swinging the tennis racket around like a friggin' windmill, when the rat fog isn't anywhere near him, but running around the edges of the room like a steamy baseboard. And I'm all, â€Å"You must chill, Spunk Monkey, my boots are scratching the counters.† Which Jared takes as his cue to start screaming like a little girl. (When Lily and I were going through our Gothic Lolita fashion phase, which we both abandoned later, me because I'd just gotten my lip ring and I kept dribbling lattes on my lacy parts, and Lily because ruffles made her ass look huge, we used to go to Washington Square Park and practice our horrified little-girl screams, but even without practice, Jared was way better than either of us ever was. I think maybe it's his asthma. Me and Lily could pown him at creepy staring, though.) Anyway, I was just glad that Jody took his dagger away from him, because someone could have lost an eye if he was still holding on to it when I swept his feet out from under him with the same stainless-steel torchiere lamp that the Countess had used on Tommy. (Although it was kind of bent now.) And he's all, â€Å"Ow, ow, ow.† And I'm all, â€Å"Your cross-dressing sissy-man kung-fu is no match for my superior household lighting kung-fu.† And he whines like, â€Å"I'm going home. You hurt me. You suck. This sucks. I have to go have family dinner-with my family-and I'm going to school tomorrow so you can just fuck off and die, Abby Normal.† And I'm like, â€Å"Fine, give me my boots.† And he's like, â€Å"Fine.† And I'm like, â€Å"Fine.† And it would have been way better if he could have just stormed out right then, but it took us about a half hour to get my boots off of him, with me sitting in the sink and him on the counter, guarding me with the tennis racket, because it turned out that I have a pretty low tolerance for rat fog trying to bite me, too. ‘Kayso, we got my boots off of Jared and he decided to stay and help because it turns out that even a stream of biting rat fog is more fun than family dinner. So Foo had the Shop Vac all scienced up with sunlight LEDs and whatnot and he turns it on and starts sucking in the mist with most awesome suckage. (Gay Builder Bob rocks hardware!) And it's so cool, because we can see the fog go in-then we can hear the thump as the sun LED turns the rats to solid again and they hit the inside of the plastic drum. And Foo is all yelling over the motor, â€Å"We may have to unload and put them in their boxes before we get too many. We don't want to open this and try to deal with a hundred rats.† And I'm all, â€Å"Why don't we just leave them in there until sunup and then they'll all be asleep?† And Foo looks at me, all surprised, and I'm like, â€Å"Shut up. I can be smart and hawt.† And he's all, â€Å"‘Kay,† which I don't know whether he meant sarcastically, or that I couldn't be smart, or that I wasn't hawt. But I never found out, because right then the Shop Vac starts making this, foof-thoop splat noise, and Jared lets loose with his little-girl scream. And it turns out that the exhaust of the Shop Vac is blowing vampy rats out the back side, which is the foof-thoop noise, and splattering them against the wall, which is the splat. And with every one, Jared is eeking. So it's like, Foof-thoopsplat-eek! Foof-thoop-splat-eek! Foof-thoop-splat-eek! I know! It would make a totally cool industrial beat for a dance groove. But I didn't sample it because there was stuff happening. And Foo is all, â€Å"Pick them up and put them in their boxes. Seal them with duct tape.† ‘Cause it turns out that vampy rats are pretty durable, and after they splat and slide down the wall, they are starting to pull themselves together again and sort of limp away, but slow enough to catch. But they're still all squishy and whatnot. So Jared and I just turn to Foo and give him our best, â€Å"Bitch, please,† look. So Foo's all, â€Å"Okay, then, you work the hose.† And I'm all, â€Å"Sure, now you want me to work your hose-â€Å" And he's all, â€Å"Abby, please!† Up until then I thought Foo was the most chill love ninja in the Bay Area, but it turns out that if his science gets a little sideways he goes to pieces. So I take the hose and start doing the rat suck, while Foo finds some rubber gloves and a spatula to scrape up the splatter pets. Then Jared gets the idea of shooting the rats right into their little plastic cages, which, as it turns out, kind of works after we blast a couple of them through the plastic and he starts holding the boxes against a pillow he tapes on the wall. And Foo starts duct taping on the lids before the vamp rats can pull themselves together. Then I'm all, â€Å"You know, if we could use this to shoot tiny dogs at the vamp kitties, we'd be finished with this nonsense in a day or two.† And Foo and Jared both roll their eyes at me like I'm high or something, when they are the ones sealing in mashed rats for freshness. ‘Kayso, by, like, midnight, we have all the rats boxed again, and most of them are kind of fixed, but some of them are still pretty fucked up from the flight, and Jared is all, â€Å"I'm going home. I have issues.† Which I know probably means that he is going to go home and break the news to Lucifer 2 that they are no longer BFFs because Jared has lost his rodent wood forever due to our night of rat carnage, which is a good thing, I guess. Then Foo is like, â€Å"I have to go, too. I have to meet with my academic advisor in the morning, and I have to prepare, then I have work in the afternoon.† And I'm all, â€Å"You can prepare here.† And Foo's like, â€Å"I don't think I can.† And he looks away. I was going to tell him that I had decided to become a creature of the night, but they were bailing on me, so I was all, â€Å"Fine. You two run along. I'll stay here.† And Foo was like, â€Å"Wait until dawn, then give each of them a water bottle of blood. They'll heal. But make sure you tape their cages back up so they can't escape. Blah, blah, biology, science, behavior, science word, science word, blah, blah.† So I kissed him like it was the last time, and went into the bedroom to lie down and wait until dawn, but there was like this huge maze made out of wood on our bed, so I went back out into the living room and chilled with the rats on the futon until dawn. I couldn't sleep anyway, because I was thinking of all the people I was totally going to get revenge on when I was nosferatu, after I found Jody and Tommy and rescued them, of course. ‘Kayso, like the Terminator (the liquid one, not the one that was governor), I will rise from the wreckage of my own metallic spooge to conquer all who oppose me. I know what I have to do. When Foo is at work, and Jared is at school, I shall use the blood that is blessed with the dark gift and become nosferatu. So suck it, bitches! ‘Kayso, at dawn, when all the rats stopped scrambling around in their little cages, I found one of the syringes that Tommy had gotten from the needle exchange program when he was pretending to be a junky, and I drew blood from the most healthy vamp rat we had. Then I had to decide to drink it or inject it, and after a while, I decided to inject it, which it turns out works just like in the movies and hurts way less than getting your eyebrow pierced. So then I lay down and waited for the vamping to come on. I thought about Foo, riding the BART all the way back to his parents' house in the Sunset instead of staying with me, and how that was kind of an assbag move on his part. And I thought of our time together, over six weeks, and how it would be hard on him when I was a superior creature of unspeakable evil and supernatural beauty. And I thought that maybe the Countess and Flood and I might have to live together in a mnage trois, and Foo and Jared might have to be our bug-eating minions, like Renfield in Dracula, except Foo would still have his fly manga hair and I would do him occasionally out of pity. And I cried a little, over the loss of my humanity and whatnot, because I realized that as soon as I was done saving Tommy and Jody, and enslaving Foo and Jared, I was going to sneak into Mr. Snavely's living room one night-come in as mist under the door-then form into my most awesome alabaster naked badassness and freak him completely the fuck out for failing me in Biology, and that it would be kind of an inhuman thing to do. And as I grieved, I fell into the deep sleep of the undead. I know. Trs awesome. But no! Now I'm awake, and it's still light out, and the vamp rats are still out and I don't have super powers and my evil is still totally speakable. Fucksocks! I forgot, I have to die before I change. I looked all over for that potassium chloride stuff that Foo said they killed the rats with, but all I found was the hammer, and I was all, â€Å"I don't think so.† So I went up to Market Street and thought I'd throw myself in front of a bus, but then, what if they left my body out in the sun and I burned up? So that was out. So then I was like, â€Å"Oh, duh, cut your wrists?† But it hurt like holy fuck, so I only kind of cut one wrist a little bit, and I bled for like a half hour and I wasn't even light-headed, so I was all, â€Å"Fuck this fun-free circus, I need an accomplice.† So I called the suicide hotline. And I'm all, â€Å"I need help.† And the guy is all, â€Å"What's your name?† And I'm all, â€Å"You don't have caller ID? What kind of lame hotline is this?† And he's all, â€Å"It says here that your name is Allison. Are you okay, Allison?† And I'm all, â€Å"No, I'm not okay. I'm calling the suicide hotline.† And he's all, â€Å"You don't want to commit suicide, Allison.† And I'm all, â€Å"Exactly, doofasaurus, I need someone to take me out. I need it to be quick, private, painless, and it shouldn't fuck up my hair too much.† And he's like, â€Å"But there's so much to live for.† So I'm like, â€Å"You're burning my minutes, fuckstick. I need a number for a hit man or one of those Kevorkian doctors.† And he's all, â€Å"I can't help you with that.† So I'm all, â€Å"Loser!† And I offed my phone. I can't believe it, but it turns out that the Motherbot was right. Sometimes, the only people you can trust are family. (â€Å"‘Scuse me, I barely suppressed a rainbow yawn when I typed that.) So here I am, waiting for my little sister, Ronnie, to get home from school so she can murder me, then hide my body under the bed until I return as the true Mistress of the Greater Bay Area Dark. This will be my last entry as a mortal. I have to go pick out an ensem for my death. I wonder how she'll do it? It better be painless or the first thing on my undead to-do list will be to open a bottle of Whoop-Ass P.M. on little sister.

Thursday, November 7, 2019

How and why was Stalin able to gain power essays

How and why was Stalin able to gain power essays There are different interpretations of how and why Stalin was able to gain power, either concentrating on his own actions and abilities, or the situation at the time and the failure of his opponents. It would appear that the success of Stalin was due to both his own strengths and actions in the political arena and the weaknesses displayed by his opponents, in relation to the prevailing circumstances of the time. Stalin was, by opportunism or careful planning, able to gain control of the party machine and use it to his advantage, and use his own political skills to out manoeuvre his opponents, while they often displayed lackluster tactics in a vain attempt to win the support of a party loyal to Stalin. The political positions to which Stalin was elevated within the Communist Party were undoubtedly of major importance in his successful campaign to establish himself as the leader of the USSR. Before the death of Lenin it was evident that Stalin had huge power within the party machine, as Lenin himself expressed in his Testament, and Lynch explains the accumulation of this power in reference to the nature of Soviet government from 1917 onwards, as the lack of precedent and guidelines led to the creation of individual advancement which would, ordinarily, not exist. The acquisition by Stalin of his political offices from 1917 to 1922 increased his power over the party machine immensely, as he found himself with more authority over both personnel and policy. Most importantly, his appointment to the position of General Secretary of the Communist Party in 1922 put him in the position of being the vital link-man with access to personal files of all party members and the responsibility f or recording and conveying party policy. The power of patronage, which also came along with this position, though not Lenins intention, gave Stalin the power to place supporters in key positions and the power to ...

Monday, November 4, 2019

African Americans in Pop Culture Essay Example for Free

African Americans in Pop Culture Essay African American (597) , African (466) , Pop Culture (18) , Funk (4) Haven't found the essay you want? Get your custom sample essay for only $13.90/page ? African Americans have had an incredible lasting impression on popular culture. African American singers, artists, entrepreneurs, athletes and actors have all had their say and have really stood out within the past few years. They’ve also grown and not grown in different ways all around from music, to television, to movies. African American stereotypes still exist in all aspects of pop culture, while many are trying to get away from what audiences assume is the typical black person. African Americans have been fighting for and against their own stereotypes when they started breaking out into music, then branching out into television, and making it big in the film industry. They’ve gone from being the dumb, uneducated, and underprivileged minority of America, and have started to make themselves more known as gang bangers and thugs, which are often seen as heroes in popular culture. African Americans haven’t only made a name for themselves or left a footprint in only their culture, but in American culture all around. African Americans have been making their mark in music all throughout history. Many started with the jazz and bebop rebellion during the 1940s and ’50s in Detroit. They made their point by trying to be different. They didn’t want to follow the typical white, swing music criteria, and that’s exactly what happened. Bebop wasn’t so mainstream, and that’s what made it their own. They preferred small, unique combos to play instead of big named stars in the music industry. Detroit was shedding light on the working class people of the town and wanted to really make a sound for them. â€Å"The 1940s created an â€Å"afro-modernism,† a response to the urbanization, industrialization, and modernization of African American Culture. † Because of their movement ahead in music, they also made their movement in business. And so emerged an incredibly successful, black capitalist enterprise, Motown Records, founded by Barry Gordy. Along with the movement in Detroit, the Harlem Renaissance had happened even before all the rage for jazz and bebop, which raised awareness to the visual arts, which led to even more developments in music. And even earlier at the beginning of the 20th century, blacks were starting to be accepted into acclaimed schools to study music and they were allowed to join the base of white people in symphony orchestras. During the ’50s, doo-wop and soul music became popular. That’s when legends like Ray Charles emerged and paved the way for others. Soul music remained popular among blacks for long after the pop sounds started to wave through. By the end of the decade and moving into the ’70s, blacks were starting to crossover into the typical white music trends. Psychadelic music had become popular. Jimi Hendrix, along his wah-wah pedal innovation, became one of the most popular guitarists during the era. Right after that, soul had become the popular music in the black community and was starting to revolutionize African-American music. Soul had continued success in popularity during the ’70s, but the ’70s also brought along a rise in black bands. White people were listening to country, disco, and all sorts of rock music, while the African-Americans had their funk, pop, soul, and jazz music that was on a totally different spectrum from their white counterparts. The ’70s was also when Djs started mixing their own beats and playing their funk records the way they wanted to so they could get their audience to dance. And with the beats produced by Djs along with the poets who would read their poems to those beats, came the emergence of hip hop music. The era of hip hop music was a new revolution in African American popular culture. African Americans in Pop Culture. (2016, Dec 17).

Saturday, November 2, 2019

Influence of language Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 1250 words

Influence of language - Essay Example The language was much more formal than she could ever think of making at home. Tan recognizes that scripted English or the English used to address a large group of professionals greatly differs from the language she talks to her loved ones with. Although both are generally recognized as English, yet she is much more careless in the use of tenses, the pronunciation and the selection of words while talking to her husband or her mom than she is while talking to the outsiders. That is indeed true! Our English at formal gatherings is way different from what we speak in our homes. In fact, the level of formality we maintain in our expression accords with the degree to which a certain occasion is formal. Thus, I am not at all formal while addressing a crowd at a birthday party but I am formal to my utmost capacity while addressing a speech in the school. In Tan’s case, the difference in English was found to be characterized by the difference of relationship she had with people she talked to at different points in time. This made the English she used while talk ing to her loved ones, more of a language of intimacy than Standard English language. Tan talks about her mother’s English and discusses it with reference to a passage based on her direct quotes. Tan’s mother’s English in no way, conforms to the formal standards of English grammar. This contrasts with the fact that she is a regular reader and viewer of famous English novels and programs. Yet Tan says that the way her mother spoke helped shape her imagination because her mother made frequent use of imagery in her browbeaten English. Tan says that people including herself have conventionally tried to judge her mother’s ideas and thoughts by the quality of her language. Since her English was poor, nobody ever took her seriously. In order to make people take her seriously. This is an unfortunate reality of our society and is also a prime